Saturday, October 17, 2009

Whatever happened to 70's sticom characters?

A friend of mine asked an innocent question, whatever happened to the first Mrs. Brady?  Being a writer, & sometimes a very evil writer, I responded with this a very scary story.  I probably shouldn't post it here, though.  It might give you nightmares; I can be extremely evil (especially when you take into consideration that I was working on my crime thriller).  Next, I was asked whatever happened to Carol Brady’s first husband.  This is what I conjured up for him:

Carol's 1st hubby was a door to door candy salesman. Turns out, he was peddling more than candy. It also turns out, he liked men. One day, he was caught by his lover's partner, who flew into a jealous rage & promptly beat him to death. At the funeral, Carol looked into the coffin & said, "I guess life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get".

Another friend then asked, what about the original Mr. Partridge?  Here we go!

Mr. Partridge owned a successful greenhouse. Unbeknownst to Shirley, he was also a secret agent who'd stumbled upon a plot to kill the President. Through a series of recorded wire taps, he captured the evidence. He was going to give the tapes to his superiors, when he was attacked by his adversary in his nursery. His boss managed to get to him, as he was breathing his last, laboured breaths. "Where did you hide the evidence?" Gasping for air, he whispered, "in . . . . the . . . . pear tree."

And, the last of the 70’s sitcom history.  Whatever happened to Mel from Alice?

It took some digging, but I FINALLY found out what happened to Mel. After selling the diner, he moved to Las Vegas to do some gambling. Being a hard worker, he quickly grew tired & took a job as a chef in a high end restaurant. The problem was, he couldn't get used to the new lingo. Java for coffee, pasta for noodles, etc., & was constantly messing up. After weeks of being yelled at, he'd finally had enough. He picked up a steaming pot of polenta & dumped it over the boss' head. As he was being led to jail (where he had a heart attack & sadly, died), a waitress asked, "Mel, why'd you do it??" Over his shoulder, he hollered back, "Miss my grits"

You know, I have to walk around with all this stuff going through my mind!  Aren’t you glad you’re you??

The Curious Case of the Brunette Lucy

The Curious Case of the Brunette Lucy
She was pretty dumb.